Tex Perkins & His Ladyboyz

Andy J Ryan Apr 11, 2023

Tex Perkins & his Ladyboyz – The Grand Ballroom Star City – 25 October 2008
Tex Perkins and his Ladyboyz unleashed a dazzling load of No 1’s and No 2’s on the glamorous Grand Ballroom of Star City.

How does one make a unique and unforgettable night of musical entertainment these days? First take a bunch of road-hardened rock’n’roll reprobates, dress them in splendid white suits, add a couple of chicks with dicks, put them inside a sophisticated venue and let them loose on some of the most cringe-worthy & middle of the road tunes of musical history. Tex Perkins & his Ladyboyz – whose members include former God guitarist Joel Silbersher, Charlie Owen, James Cruickshank, a Vanda and a Dallas Crane – are what could best be described as a contemporary, crooning crap-pop revue. The songs the band provide their ‘unique interpretations’ of, it must be understood, are timelessly terrible - and there is no respect shown for them at all, Billy Idol, Mondo Rock – even Olivia Newton-John - were sleazily dragged into the gutter. Take Dr Hooks ‘Love You a Little Bit More’, is already dubious chorus of “When you think I've loved you all I can/I'm gonna love you a little bit more“ was further defiled with the addition of “I’m going to turn you over and then I’m going to love you a little bit more” because, as Tex explained, that’s the kind of lovers the Ladboyz are – considerate ones!
Captain & Tenille’s ‘Do that To Me One More time’ was introduced with “My mum wouldn’t let me listen to this song as she said it’s the dirtiest song ever”. The arrival of Jimmy Barnes on stage to guest-warble ‘You Made Me Feel Brand New’ seemed to be a call to arms for the drunks in the room including one utterly shickered twit commandeering one of the aisles who was about as successful at handstands as Venus de Milo and would later jump on stage and ingloriously and disturbingly disrobe.
The spirited cheer for ‘Barnsey’ did however fire the Ladyboyz up, with Tex responding with “Alright, that’s enough - it’s not his show!”
before unleashing a corking ‘Benny and the Jets’. A conga line even broke out during the next number, the infamous ‘Escape (the Pina Colada Song) – modified to “If you like making love at midnight with a dude in a cape” - and the crowd soon resembled a wedding reception at that stage where the handbags are circled and its every drunk aunt for themselves on the dance floor. What must have been the funnest album recording sessions ever has translated into one of the most enjoyable occasions the bright lights of Star City have ever shone upon.